Off Centre

I've been feeling 'left out'. I don't know why.

I've been feeling abit 'off centre' i guess. When i read that play, i feel that i can really connect with the characters sometimes. I see their rationale, and somewhat, understand how they feel.

Are you sure that it is only because the play is crafted so intelligently in that way?

Is there a possibility, that we ourselves are off centre in our own ways? We have our moments...

Remember that passage that came our for Prelim 2? That's one of them.

i think i have lost some rationality myself.

What is...

How do you tell if ones sincere or not. People put up a great act nowadays. Sometimes they seem sincere. At other times, they do not.

Am i just reading too much into people's actions? Do i think too much? Is it wrong of me to scrutinize their every action and choice of words to extract a rough idea of what they are thinking or feeling?

Why bother, to ask of me, like you care, when you only show it minimally on a superficial level.

Why bother, to ask of me, like you enjoy my company, when you're obviously doing plenty of other stuff when i'm around.

Do you really need me to be there? Obviously not.
But, do you really want me to be there? I'll keep my fingers crossed.

You might want to ponder over that. You know who you are.

I'll disappear. Just say the word.

Anticipating..

I'm waiting for all my prelim results to come back to me. So far, it have been very mediocre... sigh. >.< I'm disappointed.

In addition, its like exactly a month to the 'O' Levels. I think i'm going to die. the anxiety/panic derived from it is enough to kill me. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

>.< save me. I like company! :)

Sudden Realisation

Recently, i've been finding myself in different difficult positions. I don't really know how to explain them. Or maybe they may just not be that difficult to you.I just feel really lost at times.

Have you ever walked home, and a sudden thought of what possible consequences there could have been for your past actions comes to mind? That happened to me. I just went all numb, and i just walked and walked. My legs were carrying me of their own accord. I couldn't really feel them. It felt like they weren't part of me. It was a terrible experience. It was like devoured in cold flames, from head to toe.

Sigh. Well, my Prelim 2s are over. Just up for the final obstacle for this lap of my life. The ever so big 'O' Levels. They're in 5 weeks time. Soon, it'll be all over. Soon, it'll be back to rotting at home and partying with my friends. And when i do get back my results, I'll ensure I look forward with no regrets.

Light

Okay. Its coming to the end of the Sept Holidays. & i havent blogged for so long. Damn Prelim 2.ah wells. O lvls are coming up anyways.

okay, so. what have i been up to?
i've just been hanging out with friends, studying, consulting Ms koh... etc...

oh oh, i went back for council bbq on monday. was kinda short =/ I preferred last year's bbq. had so much more time to play. hahaha. :P Ah well, i guess they have their own programmes now.

Lets see... i went to CHOMP CHOMP with ben wong one of the nights... bleh the bbq mussels were bad...

I went to 'shop' with BRIAN CHENG, Joel Yip & Jon Leong. They were a really cheerful bunch. great to be with juniors now and then =) thanks guys!
BRIAN U OWE ME MONEY

I was also out with Hong Chuan, Lynus, Wilfred after that... sat at starbucks and drank coffee.. talked about stuff. (dota) sians. hahahaha. =p

I also went to Nick Fengs house to study! Bleh they convinced me. weren't as productive as i hope. AND they blamed me for influencing them to sleep early. W-T-F . zzz

I went to look for Ms koh in school for lit assistance. i suck at that subject. plainly. lol. and Mr Kwok/Ms Koh bought me lunch at Yeo Keng Nam! WootS!

hmmm..i went to watch g-force! was a cool movie... studied with some other friends. that was really really fun. haha. ;)

and yea.. that pretty much sums up my Sept Holidays. till friday. haha. needa get back into the 'exam mood' which i'm apparently not in. As Ms Koh SAYS.